Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Still asking myself what the point is.

As the first flush of creative fire dies away, I am beginning to question my own motivations for undertaking such an enormous task for so little reward. The real reason, aside from wanting to because I can, was that my best friend is leaving for parts unknown at the end of next month, and I have no earthly idea how I will pass the time without her around. (insert sniffling here.) I jokingly told her that once she is gone, this dress will become my best friend. She was less thoroughly amused than I thought she might be. This could be because she had chosen to move to literally the end of the earth, the point at which you are so far from civilization that you begin to head back toward it again. This is the place that used to be in the time zone past Hawaii, the one right before the International Date Line. Then she changed her mind. Something about being so close to tomorrow...

Anyway, I can no longer use her for an excuse. To be sure, she is still heading far away, but it still seems closer than her last choice. If you are wondering, she is contemplating Japan, which is, I realize, on the far side of the IDL, but it seems closer somehow.

So then, if distance is not the motivator, the question remains: What is? I refuse to believe it is sheer ennui.

It is puzzling, to be sure, but if I dwell on it I think that I will become obsessed with finding the answer to that in place of the truly important and daunting task before me. I received the patter for the underpinning today in the mail, and I am now attempting to figure out precisely how much spiral steel I will need - doesn't it seem that 12 yds is a lot to hold in one (admittedly increasingly matronly) figure?

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